


The sun sets in the sea.

by xoxodisasterbabe



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Choking, Clothed Sex, Getting Together, M/M, Minor Annette Fantine Dominic/Mercedes von Martritz, Mutual Pining, Praise Kink, Soft Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Soft Sylvain Jose Gautier, no beta we die like Glenn, they're dumb, uh, we're all softies here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-07-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:28:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25381624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xoxodisasterbabe/pseuds/xoxodisasterbabe
Summary: All you've got to do is wait for the sunset.(you've already read this fic probably fifteen times because it's got most of the common elements of a "sylvain and felix get their shit together after pining after each other for years" but if you're like me and keep reading every single one of them this is short and mostly sweet includes sparring and soft felix and established annie/mercie in the background.)
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Comments: 3
Kudos: 75





	1. The Sea.

**Author's Note:**

> i needed a break from my au and life so i went to hide in the forest in my cottage by the sea (what up fellow cottage queers i made flatbread in my old cast-iron skillet and tea from berry leaves i picked around my house)
> 
> and then i wrote this whole thing on my phone, just cleaned it up on my laptop.

Felix is fluid like the sea. And he’s beautiful.

Sylvain watches him out of the corner of his eye, elbow on the table and face resting in his hand as he pretends to listen to what the girl on the other side of the table says.

It was a genius move, really, picking a table with sight directly into the training grounds. His heart swoops when Felix makes a particularly graceful movement, spins around on his tip-toes and then uses the force of his whole body as he slams the wooden sword into the ground where the imagined enemy is.

"-and I said that she doesn't realize at all what makes a good dancer if that's what she thinks, right?"

"Right, yeah, I agree." Sylvain hums, eyes flickering back to the girl for a second. Felix really would be a good dancer. The control he has over his body is truly unmatched. Well, maybe matched by Dorothea.

"Anyway, do you think I should?" the girl - Goddess, what was her name - asks, and Sylvain tries to remember what she's asking about.

"Uh, yeah, absolutely, what's the loss right?" He smiles, and she nods seriously. She hasn't even noticed that he's not paying attention to her spiel, thankfully she has been preoccupied with her own stories which in Sylvain’s eyes is perfect because then, he doesn't really have to do anything.

"Try-outs are on Thursday, will you come watch?" She asks. Sylvain's eyes flicker back to the training grounds, but Felix is gone.

"I'll try to make it." He replies with a plastered on grin to hide his disappointment. The girl smiles brightly.

"Perfect! I've got to get going, but I'll see you... Later?"

There's some weight to _later_ , Sylvain knows what it means because he's heard it a million times before.

"Yeah, later." He replies with a wink. Before the girl leaves, she bends down and kisses him as she walks by his chair. She tastes like that rose scented lip balm that's so popular nowadays, that the girls wear to get a sheen to their lips. He really doesn't like it. It leaves a waxy residue on his lips.

"Bye Sylvain." She smiles two inches from his face. Her breath smells sweet like the cake they've just shared. Felix doesn't like cake.

"Bye babe." Sylvain smiles back, and then she's walking away. He closes his eyes, sighs, and leans back in the chair.

He's honestly kind of pathetic. But what else is he supposed to do?

"You'll learn more if you actually _join_ me for training than staring at me like some creep."

Sylvain's eyes snap open. Felix is sitting down across from him where the girl was just a few moments ago, and pushes the plate with the leftover cake to the side with a grimace. He's beautiful. His hair is almost falling out of its bun and Sylvain resists the instinct to reach over and pull it out so Felix's long hair falls over his shoulders.

His hair had grown so _long_ since Sylvain last saw him. He hadn't realized at first, since Felix always wore it up, but then they'd gone to wash up after a rare training Sylvain had actually join him for and when Felix had taken the ribbon out of his hair, it had cascaded down like a black waterfall, past his collarbones and Sylvain had frozen in place and stared more blatantly than he ever had at anything.

"What?" Felix had snapped when he'd realized Sylvain had gone still, his face flushing ever so slightly, and Sylvain had almost passed out.

"It's longer." He'd croaked intelligently, and Felix had sighed, turned his face away.

"It's been two years, you know."

Two long years. Two years of trying to convince himself he wasn't painfully in love with the kid who used to come crying to him when he was hurt, two years of distractions, two years and then he'd finally figured he was fine, he was over it, as over it as he could be.

And then they'd both joined the academy at the same time and one look at Felix later everything crashed over him like a wave again, dragging him out to sea and leaving him there to drown in an ocean of his own pining.

"Are you drunk?"

Sylvain is snapped back to reality. He's been staring, probably, and Felix is suspiciously sniffing his teacup. Sylvain lets out an easy laugh to cover up his misstep.

"No, no, I just got _really_ tired at your mention of training." He grins, and Felix sighs.

"Lazy." He mumbles. "It's considered rude to spy on people, you know." He adds, getting out of the chair.

"I wasn't _spying_ , I was _studying_ " Sylvain retorts. Felix snorts.

"Right, you're learning a lot about lancing by watching me practice sword fighting."

Sylvain smiles innocently, Felix shakes his head at him and then he starts walking away.

"Hey, dinner later?" Sylvain shouts after him. Felix doesn't turn around, but he gives him a thumbs up. Sylvain smiles at Felix back even though he can't see it.

He's not sure when he made the stupid decision to fall in love with Felix who's never in a million years going to love him back. (well, in that way - Felix loves him, Sylvain's sure of that. But not like Sylvain loves Felix.) Or _why_ he's chosen to torture himself like this for what's probable to be a lifetime.

Maybe it's because he can feels _high_ when he makes a joke that Felix actually smiles at during dinner, butterflies fluttering under his ribs and up his throat in the most pleasant way. It's definitely why. Plus, he gets to be around Felix, gets to be his friend, which is a privilege dished out to few, so Sylvain should probably consider himself lucky. In addition to that, Felix isn't interested in much else than training, keeping ugly jealously to a minimum. If he's going to be unhappily in love, Felix is probably his best pick. What happens in the future when heirs and titles get important isn't something he needs to think about right now.

It's not like he doesn't feel jealous ever. A girl approaches them during dinner and asks _Felix_ , not Sylvain, if the seat next to them is taken and Sylvain almost glares at her, almost.

"Does it look like someone's sitting there?" Felix asks her, perplexed. She smiles sweetly, and Sylvain’s stomach turns. Which is for nothing because the second she sits down, Felix turns to him again and continues talking as though she was never there in the first place.

"Anyway, the technique I'm working on, didn't your dad have a collection of books about Hoshidan battle strategies? The library here is lacking, so I thought..."

"I'll write him and ask him to send as many books as he can." Sylvain replies with a broad smile, and Felix pauses for a second.

"Thanks."

"Anything for you babe."

It rolls off his tongue easily, and Felix's expression falls. He glares at him, and then he sighs.

"You're lucky I really need those books."

"What techniques are you learning?" The girl chimes in, and Felix's perplexed look returns, utterly confused as to why she's even talking to him.

"Are you a swordfighter?" he asks dubiously, eyeing her skinny body.

"No silly, I'm studying faith, but-"

Felix snorts.

"Then why are you asking about sword techniques, that won't help you." He turns to Sylvain. "You finished?"

Sylvain nods. Felix rises, and gestures for him to follow. Sylvain resists the temptation to turn around and stick his tongue out at the girl, who's clearly slightly insulted at Felix's obvious lack of interest.

"I wonder what she wanted." He questions as they leave their dirty dishes, and Sylvain laughs because it's kind of hilarious that Felix is this dense. But then again, if he weren't, he'd caught onto the fact that Sylvain would lie down on the ground and let Felix walk on him if he asked so maybe he should be grateful.

"She was _hitting on you_ " Sylvain replies, shoulders still shaking. Felix's eyebrows shoot up in surprise and then his face comes down to rest in something strangely gloomy.

"I'm surprised you didn't swoop in to make a move." He mutters. Sylvain smiles innocently.

"Take a girl from you? I'd _never_. Plus, I was busy listening to your spiel about the army of only foot fighters and their sword techniques. Listening to you is way more interesting." He replies as they're leaving.

"Right." Felix rolls his eyes.

"Now that you know though, wanna turn around and-"

"I'm busy." Felix replies before Sylvain even gets to finish his suggestion, and the green monster inside of him cheers. So he laughs easily again.

"Right, I forgot."

_"You're vile, Sylvain." Felix spits, as Sylvain desperately tries to get back up on his feet. Felix kicks him in the chest and looks down at him, looks him in the eyes and speaks with such poison in his voice Sylvain can't even try to get up again._

_"I never even liked you. And I'm getting married."_

_"What?!" Sylvain wheezes. They're sitting in the courtyard, and Felix is mindlessly stirring his tea._

_"I said I'm getting married to - oh, here she is!" Felix's face lights up as Annette shows up out of thin air._

_"Hi Sylvain, look at the ring Felix gave me!" She cries happily, shoving her hand in his face. It's a big, sparkling blue stone and when he looks up again Felix is smiling at her, sickeningly sweet and Sylvain feels his head spinning out of control. When he comes through and can see again, he immediately has to force the Lance of Ruin through somebodies throat since they're charging at him. Then, he registers something behind him and turns around to block Felix's sword._

_"You're a traitor!" Felix hisses through his teeth._

_"What?!" Sylvain cries in confusion, and blocks Felix's next strike._

_"You betrayed us all Sylvain, I guess I should have known you were no good." Felix spits and when Sylvain is looking down he's wearing a bright red in contrast to Felix's azure armour._

_Then, just as Felix moves to strike again his eyes widen before all life disappears from them and he falls forward into Sylvain’s arms._

_"No no no no, Felix, don't die on me, come on-"_

_"Thank me later!" The anonymous red soldier shouts, running off before Sylvain has a chance to avenge Felix's death._

He wakes up to a loud knocking on his door, sitting up so quickly he bangs his arm against the wall.

"You promised you'd come practice with me this morning, what the fuck are you doing in there?" Felix shouts through his door. Sylvain swallows and takes a deep breath in hopes of calming down his racing heart.

"Uh, I'll be there, you go ahead, promise!" He shouts back, voice not entirely steady.

"If you fall back asleep, I'll break your door down." Felix replies, and then Sylvain listens to his footsteps disappearing down the hall.

His head hurts. That was _awful_ and not even Felix's disgruntled voice has really grounded Sylvain in the fact that none of it was real. They'd been happening a lot recently. The nightmares. It's kind of pathetic, really, but maybe that's what endlessly pining for someone does to you.

Although in the dream Felix was marrying Annette. Sylvain giggles inadvertently, because if anything, that's ridiculous. Where's Mercedes in this dream? Stupid. He drags himself out of the damp sheets, groaning, and moves to pull on some clothes because no matter how much he wants to _sleep_ , he 1) promised Felix and 2) doesn't think Felix was kidding when he said he'd knock Sylvain’s door down.

When he arrives to the training grounds, the sight of Felix with his hair tied in a ponytail intensively focusing on the movements of his sword makes his chest feels lighter. When Felix turns around, glowers at him and tells him he's late, the weights in his lungs disappear almost completely.

Despite Felix's recent interest in Hoshidan sword techniques, today, they're both using lances, he informs Sylvain.

"Why?" He looks at Felix, slightly perplexed as he lifts two training lances off the racks. Felix walks over, grabs one, and replies when he's walking over to the other side with his back to Sylvain.

"Because I need to be able to be versatile. If I end up with a lance in my hands, I need to know how to use it properly. You're the best lancer at the academy." He replies, and Sylvain’s heart jumps a little bit at the rare praise. He's grinning widely at Felix when they're facing each other again.

"Really, you think so?" He asks gleefully. Felix makes a strange expression and clears his throat.

"Well, it's true based on what I've witnessed and on the fact that you're scoring the highest in class out of everyone, in every house. Goddess knows _how_ since you never practice..." He trails off as Sylvain’s smile grows even bigger.

"I had no idea you thought so highly of me, Fe, I'm flattered!" He grins, and Felix scowls.

"If all you're going to do is chat, you can leave."

Sylvain looks down at the lance in his hands, shifts his grip ever so slightly and weighs it in his hands.

"Do you want to start or should I?" He asks, glancing up at Felix again, adjusting his stance. Finally, Felix's lips turn upwards, and a fire starts lighting in his eyes. He moves his feet, bends his knees.

"Come at me."

Their lances clash loudly, but Felix's body catches the recoil and this is when the differences between their builds are the most obvious. Felix's lance is lighter, and he's faster, but Sylvain is stronger. When experience comes into play, he's clearly got the upper hand. He makes two quick strikes, a combination he's been working on for a while now and only gotten to try out on the battlefield twice, but when the second strike comes from below, Felix's lance goes flying in the air, and Sylvain points his own at Felix's throat.

"I win." He grins.

"Well, obviously." Felix sighs, rolling his eyes before he goes to retrieve his lance. "I don't expect to win against you the first time." He turns around, determined expression back on his face, gripping the lance tightly. "Again."

Sylvain knocks Felix's lance away. He finds openings. Again and again, he points his weapon against Felix's throat, back, and chest. Every time, Felix grips his lance a little differently, weighs his feet differently - Sylvain notices, because he knows what that's like. Trying to find your feet and comfort in lancing is difficult, especially on the ground, off the horse. Lances are _big_ and heavy, a mismatch to Felix's slim body.

When Sylvain knocks him to the ground, possibly using a little too much force because Felix groans as he hits the dirt, but he doesn't even get the chance to ask Felix if he's okay before the other boy is back on his feet, the fire really burning in his eyes now and a full-on grin on his face. Sylvain’s heart swells - he loves Felix like this, genuine and passionate and no scowl as far as anyone can see. Well, not like _anyone_ really gets to see him like this. He's one of few. The reminder of the fact makes Sylvain feel even lighter. Even though he's pining to the point where his brain turns it into ugly nightmares, at least he gets to do it close to Felix. At least he's one of the privileged few Felix _trusts_.

The fuzzy feeling in his chest ends up being his downfall - he's too slow, and for the first time this morning Felix has his lance poking against his chest.

"You're distracted." Felix says, eyes narrowed because of course he's perceptive now. Sylvain smiles and shrugs.

"I was thinking about breakfast."

It's not that big of a lie - he really could do with some food. Felix sighs, but it's the "begrudging agreement" sigh.

"I suppose we should wrap up."

They pack away the lances, and start heading in the direction of delicious, delicious breakfast.

"What was that combination you did?" Felix asks.

"Oh, right, I'm trying to finish it. Need one more strike to follow." Sylvain replies, flattered for _real_ that Felix both noticed and seems to approve of his strategies because he nods thoughtfully.

"You should try striking from the left, like you did _after_ the one from below but before it instead." Felix says after a short silence. Sylvain considers it for a second. It's actually a good idea.

"Yeah, I'll try that next time, I think that's a great idea. Thanks!" Sylvain replies warmly, trying desperately to reel in his affection and the thoughts in his head trying to spill out running wild with _hey, we're good together, if we got married we could do this all the time forever and become the best fighters in the country which you'd like a lot_. Felix grimaces and looks down.

"No worries." He mutters. Felix has never been good at taking compliments, or even a thanks for that matter. Not from anyone, but especially not from him. Sylvain allows himself to sling one of his arms around Felix, despite the reasonable part of his brain screaming at him that he won't be able to focus on anything all day if he does that and he has battalion lectures today which he needs to pay attention to and he won't be able to if all he thinks about is Felix, warm against his side.

"Next time we should do swords though, to be fair." He says. Felix looks up at him sceptically.

"You're an _awful_ sword fighter." He says, which is true.

"All the more reason to practice, right?" Sylvain replies innocently. Felix purses his lips and Sylvain wants to kiss them.

"I guess so."

* * *

"We're _what?!_ " Felix moans, and Byleth looks disapprovingly at him.

"I think you both have potential, magic is an incredible resource and if you can master it, you'll be able to strike from afar."

"I _know_ how to make a curved shot with a bow!" Felix retorts unhappily.

Byleth had called them both into their office at the same time and promptly told them that they're both are going to start going to Reason lectures. Sylvain didn't really mind either way - Reason looked like fun from what he'd seen from Mercedes and Annette, and having class with them was bound to be nice. Felix, however, was clearly displeased. If one were to put it lightly.

"And that's great, Felix, but you're not going to talk me out of this. This discussion ends here." Byleth sighs. Felix makes a frustrated noise and is about to argue back and Sylvain suspects it could get ugly if he allows it, so he lightly puts a hand on Felix's shoulder. He freezes for a second and then turns to look at Sylvain, unhappy expression still present on his face.

"Come on Fe, maybe it'll be fun! And... Hey, it's another class without Dimitri."

He doesn't like saying it, but he knows it's a good motivator for Felix at the moment. Unfortunately. Realization settles on Felix's face, and his frustration mellows out to grumpiness instead which is rather adorable.

"Fine."

"Great!" Byleth concludes, satisfied and rare smile on their face. "The first lecture is this afternoon. _Don't_ miss it."

Sylvain finds he _really_ enjoys Reason, and even more, that he excels at it. It doesn't take long before he shoots fireball after fireball into the suspended water-target, and one day it's suddenly _huge_ and explodes on impact.

"Oh my god Sylvain, that's Bolganone!" Annette shouts happily, and jumps him. Mercedes nods.

"It definitely is. Good going Sylvain!" She agrees.

"Don't burn down any houses." Felix mumbles behind him. He's been struggling with his Thunder from the start, and it isn't helping that he doesn't practice in favour of Hoshidan sword techniques and Lance practice. Or brawling. Or anything else physical. Sylvain feels awful for succeeding where Felix falls short, especially when it's clearly tearing him up like this.

"Felix, maybe you should ask Manuela for some tips? She was great helping me master my electric spells." Mercedes suggests softly. Felix just grumbles as a response.

"You'll get there! I'm struggling with my Excalibur spell a _lot_ and I've been doing magic _forever_." Annette fills in, peppy as ever. Felix looks up at all three of them, clearly very tired since he lets his helplessness show on his face.

"Thunder is a lot harder than Fire, you know." Mercedes says, and the tone she uses leads Sylvain to believe that she's not just saying that to make Felix feel better. Felix seems to pick up on the fact as well, and nods solemnly.

"Right." He mumbles. Sylvain wants very badly to join in with Annette and Mercedes in their encouragement, or just _hold_ Felix like he used to when they were kids because he looks so fucking sad, but he bites his tongue. It's been gnawing at Felix that he's progressing so much faster, Sylvain knows that.

"You can practice on me if you want!" He says instead, and this jots Felix out of his sad state as he stares at Sylvain incredulously.

" _What_." Felix replies and it's clear that he's trying to sound dismayed, but Sylvain hears the laughter that he's keeping down and sees the corners of his mouth twitch and his heart absolutely _soars_.

"I figured maybe it's easier with a live target?" Sylvain says innocently. Annette looks horrified and Mercedes looks troubled, and seems like she's about to say something but Felix gets there first.

"You're ridiculous." He says, turning his head down as he spins around but Sylvain hears the smile in his voice.

"Offer stands! Anything for you babe!" He replies happily, to Felix shaking his head. He doesn't even snap at Sylvain for the _babe_. Mercedes tries to interrupt again.

"Sylvain, I really don't think-"

"It's all good Mercedes, what matters is that you move forward, so what if one needs to use some unconventional methods sometimes?" Sylvain says soothingly. Annette sighs, and seems to concede. Mercedes still doesn't seem convinced in the slightest and seems like she wants to continue arguing, but this time, she's interrupted by a loud bang and a flash of light instead.

They all turn instantly towards the sound, where Felix is staring at the lightning rod. Then he seems to shift his focus to his hands, and then back.

"Felix!" Sylvain shouts, endorphins rushing through him as his body moves without him thinking, and suddenly he's wrapped his arms around Felix and lifted him into the air.

" _Sylvain_ , I swear to-"

"You did it! That was _amazing_ Felix!" Sylvain shouts with what's probably the biggest smile he's ever had on his face. And incredibly, Felix _stops_ fighting him and just stares at Sylvain with a frozen expression. It takes all of Sylvain’s poor self-discipline to not kiss him then and there because for a second, he almost thinks Felix looks like he _wants_ to be kissed. But that's Sylvain projecting.

"You're going to master Thoron in no time if your Thunder is that strong!" Annette shouts, bringing Sylvain back to reality from the bubble where only he and Felix exists. He puts Felix down on the ground gently, smiles at him apologetically but Felix barely seems upset at all, just slightly dazed. From the shock of his success, no doubt. Sylvain would also be shaken if he had skipped the phase of small flames and gone straight to flamethrower. He looks over at the lightning rod again, the ground around it is still smoking. _Pride_ is the feeling he has, which isn't entirely fair because Felix isn't _his_ to be proud of. But he's going to allow himself it anyway.

"I think that's stronger than my Thunder, show me what you did." Mercedes asks, clearly interested, and that snaps Felix out of whatever state he's in. He shows Mercedes the hand gesture he used, calls another thunderbolt from the sky which isn't quite as intense, but still incredibly impressive. Mercedes nods, and asks another question about wrist movements.

Reason turns out to be _way_ more fun when Felix is enjoying himself too. Even though the lectures can be slow, suddenly, Sylvain finds their practice with the girls is his absolute favourite time of the week. Two weeks after Felix's success, Annette perfects her Excalibur to the cheers of the rest of them, a kiss from Mercedes and a joke from Sylvain and, Felix too letting loose and laughing along with the rest of them. Reason is _definitively_ Sylvain’s favourite subject.


	2. The Sun. (5 years later)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> post time-skip

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk what the formatting is sorry

Sylvain is the sun.

He radiates heat, he's in Felix's face and he's way, way too bright. Felix squints at the sudden intrusion of red hair and glowing eyes in his field of vision, groans and pushes Sylvain’s face away because there's really no need for it to be two inches away from his own. And, it's just plain bad for his heart.

"Feee-lix!" Sylvain sings, smile just as broad as before Felix shoved him. "Wanna grab some food with me?"

Felix looks slowly from Sylvain, to the papers in front of him, and then to Sylvain again as to make a point.

"I'm working."

"Working can wait, they have Daphnel stew today and if we're late we're either getting none or we're getting lukewarm Daphnel stew which isn't nice either." Sylvain replies effortlessly, still shining. Felix groans again, and pushes himself out of the chair to the sound of Sylvain making a satisfied noise.

"You're much less prickly nowadays, I appreciate that." Sylvain says, and slings an arm around him as they start walking. Felix hums in order to not have to agree or deny or even discuss. Sylvain is warm against his side.

Sylvain is the sun.

He has always been the sun.

And he's right about Felix fighting him less - for one he has grown up, but he's also come to terms with his situation.

Sylvain is the sun. You can relish in the sunlight but only for so long, until you get burned. You don't get to touch the sun.

The metaphor doesn't work as well when Sylvain squeezes him with his arm, but it stands. Felix is in love with him, has always been in love with him, will always be in love with him, and nothing will ever come of it.

What helps also, is the fact that Sylvain has grown up too - well, it doesn't help that he somehow became broader and his voice dropped even deeper the years they spent apart, but he's not quite as insatiable anymore. Watching him running about with a different girl every damn week in their academy days had made Felix's blood boil of jealously, and he'd take his shame to the training grounds and practice brawling in the middle of the night until his hands were shaking when it got really bad. Which had proven helpful, as of the war. So there's something good in the awful situation.

Sometimes, he wonders if Sylvain knows. When he catches him staring with something Felix doesn't recognize in his eyes, it always makes his skin crawl - it feels like he knows in those moments. But if he does, he's kindly pretending that he doesn't, letting Felix keep his walls up.

It's fine, he tells himself, walking down the halls to the food hall. He's fine, just like this. He's done this for _years_ now, and even though everything is different now, and he doesn't ever really feel rested anymore, he's fine.

The next mission they head out on, they stop at a bar in the evening and Sylvain is tricked by a woman he's, as Sylvain himself would put it, "harmlessly flirting" with and Felix realizes what's about to happen too late to stop her from burying the knife deep in his chest in the middle of the bar. All blood drains from Felix's face as he watches Sylvain stutter and fall backwards.

He doesn't really register that he throws a knife of his own that hits the witch in the eye, or that she falls down lifeless, all he can feel is the blood rushing in his ears and how dry his throat feels as he shouts for a healer, cradling Sylvain in his lap. Sylvain looks up at him, _smiling_ like the idiot he is, and babbles something about _my bad_ and Felix screams at him to shut the fuck up with tears in his eyes, and has to be pried away by Ingrid and Byleth so Lysithea can do her job.

For some reason, this sole incident tears down everything Felix had built around himself in order to be "fine" with the miserable situation he was in. Not only is he unable to think about anything but the fact that he could have kept up with his magic and known how to do a healing spell himself, he has nightmares the first time he manages to fall asleep after nearly watching Sylvain die, (that's after he spends half a night punching a dummy without wrappings until his knuckles bled) and wakes up exhausted. Tired of everything. Tired of _Sylvain_ and his own heartbeat speeding up around him and worrying and his stomach flipping every time Sylvain called him "babe" as a _joke_ because of course, he'd taken to that now that he felt that his life was no longer at risk around Felix.

Felix isn't fine. He's tired.

He's over this. The whole situation. He can't do it anymore.

* * *

Then things gets even worse.

“Felix, can I ask you something?”

Mercedes looks at him, unreadable as ever. Felix shrugs, continues stitching his torn glove.

“What do you want to know?”

Mercedes takes a deep breath, and her voice is sweet and unassuming when she speaks again, contrary to the weight of the words.

“Are you in love with Sylvain?”

Felix jabs the needle straight into his hand at the same time as his head snaps up to stare at Mercedes, his heart stuck in his throat.

“Oh, Felix, I’m so sorry, here, let me-“ Mercedes apologizes, striding forward and grabbing his hand as he continues staring helplessly at her.

“W-why’d you say that?” He asks, and his stomach sinks when she looks at him with a kind smile, light emitting from her grip as the pain subsides, even though he barely even registered it. The look in her eye is way too understanding, too compassionate for his comfort and he wants to squirm, pull his hand away and leave before his conversation even happens.

“Felix.” Mercedes starts patiently. “Why did you really come back here?”

In any other situation, Felix would’ve had a good reply. But now, he feels exposed, like he’s out in the open with nothing to defend him and with the way Mercedes is looking at him, he’s left with nothing. A voice in his head is childishly yelling that he wasn’t ready, he should’ve been given time to prepare for this conversation like it’s some sort of game. And he’s losing.

“You can’t tell him.” Felix finally mumbles, face beaming shamefully red, his stomach turning as Mercedes sighs.

“Are you-“

“Don’t.”

Felix looks at her, poison in his eyes and Mercedes almost backs away at the intensity of it. Then, she looks troubled.

“Felix, I think-“

“Don’t ever talk to me, or anyone else about this again.” Felix spits between gritted teeth, swallowing down the panic that is pushing itself up his throat. Mercedes looks at him, almost pitifully (almost, since she knows better.) and then she sighs again.

“Okay. But I want-“

“I don’t want to hear it.” Felix replies, and this time he does snatch his hand away from hers, her healing spell finished since several sentences back, and walks away before she has a chance to say anything else.

* * *

"I'm an idiot, huh?"

Sylvain is grinning up at him from his hospital bed, injury too severe for him to be healed fully without a few days of bedrest. Felix had decisively avoided visiting him, which had turned out to be easier than expected when there were missions to complete. They'd been good distractions. No time to think about the ache in his chest and Sylvain's warm smile when one has to concentrate on listening for enemy steps in the woods.

"You don't say?" Felix replies, tight-lipped. Sylvain’s smile falters a little at his stony exterior.

"Come on Fe. I'm alive?" He tries, and Felix sighs. He sits down on the chair next to the bed, and Sylvain smiles _honestly_ this time and Felix's heart aches.

"This time. I'm sick of you doing this." He says, maybe a little bit too honest because really, Sylvain hasn't done much of _this_ lately. He's sick of feeling like this. Sylvain looks apologetically at him, pushes his bottom lip out like a child.

"I'm sorry. Although, I mean, you win some, you lose some. And did you see her? She was kind of worth it." Sylvain babbles and _that_ is where Felix loses it.

"She was _worth it_?" He replies, voice cold as ice and Sylvain’s face falls.

"Fe, I was kiddi-"

"It was a _joke_ huh?!" Felix spits, his fury growing out of nowhere but maybe that's what happens when you keep everything bottled up for this long and he's so fucking tired. "Everything is a fucking joke to you right? I'm _sick_ of you. You're insufferable, you don't give a fuck about anything right? Nothing fucking matters right?"

"Fe-"

"No. I'm sick of this, I'm sick of you, I'm sick of everything going to hell because of you, I'm _sick_ of this."

Sylvain stares at him, shock and confusion mixed with softness and care, which makes Felix want to die.

"Felix, where is all of this coming fr-"

"You know what? Don't _ever_ talk to me again. Leave me the _fuck_ alone."

Felix is sure his face is as dark as he feels inside because Sylvain looks more than a little taken aback. Felix takes this chance to walk off, before he has to listen to a reply, and before he does something stupid like kill Sylvain or break down completely in front of him.

Surprisingly, Sylvain obeys. When he passes Felix in the halls, he looks down at the ground, expression unreadably and uncharacteristically plain. Every time it happens, every time Sylvain looks away when he's in Felix's vicinity or gets up from the table the second Felix gets in line in the food hall, when he sits _next to him_ in his chair during their meetings without doing as much as acknowledging it, it twists Felix's heart a little bit tighter.

The weirdest thing is that nobody notices. Not at first. Sylvain is an excellent actor, making it seem like it's all coincidental that him and Felix are suddenly never spotted in the same place.

Then Ingrid catches on, because of course she would. A whole week later than Felix would have expected her to, but in her defence, she's busy. Her mind is occupied, as is everyone else's.

"You're going to tell me what's going on." she says, slamming her tray down across from him and grabbing his arm so he can't escape because she _knows_ him at this point. Felix sighs.

"What do you mean?" He replies, but doesn't even bother putting any effort into the lie.

"Don't do that." She replies, tight lipped and clearly not here to patiently coax the truth out of him. She pauses, and when she starts talking again she sounds _very_ cautious. "Did he-"

"We fought." Felix replies, not even wanting to hear what she's about to ask him about what she thinks Sylvain might have done or said. There is a moment of silence.

"No, you always fight. What is going on? What has happened?" Ingrid demands, now even more irritated and Felix desperately wishes he had the heart to snatch his wrist out of her grip so he could leave this conversation. Five years ago he would have, but he's not that kid anymore.

"I don't want to tell you." Felix says honestly, after Goddess knows how long. He knows he sounds tired. Pathetic even. Ingrid’s iron grip loosens, and when Felix looks up at her, she looks both surprised and worried.

"Felix..." She replies, brow furrowed, clearly lost for words. If Felix had said leave me alone, snapped _I don't want to talk about it_ , or anything along those lines, that'd be more along the lines of his character, so it's obvious why Ingrid looks at him like that. It's _weird_. And serious. He probably looks as broken as he feels. Either way, maybe Felix should do this truth thing more often, because now, Ingrid doesn't fight him when he stands up. The loss of her hand around his arm feels lonely, though. A part of him just wants to tell her _everything_. He shrugs at her, and then he walks away, leaving her to stare at his back as he leaves.

* * *

Almost one month of passes. Felix's focus gets so bad he almost gets his face shot off in a skirmish. The arrow only takes the tip of his nose, but it bleeds like hell anyway. In the corner of his eye, he registers Sylvain doing a second take and then turning his back to the messy scene as Mercedes arrives out of absolutely nowhere.

The next day, in the training grounds only left with a tiny scar thanks to Mercedes and her excellent healing spells, Felix knows that it's Sylvain walking in before he even says anything.

"I can't do this."

Felix spins around, eyes narrowed, because even though those words pierce his heart the way that arrow probably was meant to he _can't_ let that show.

It's surprising he manages to keep his mask on when he, for the first time in weeks really _looks_ at Sylvain. He looks about as awful as Felix feels, and his next sentence is a plea.

"Can we talk? Somewhere private?"

Felix needs to say no, or else he's going to die. Probably. He nods. Sylvain looks like he's about to cry of relief for a second, and then waves at Felix to follow him. He does. Because he's pathetic.

Sylvain leads them to the dorms. Before he has a chance to open his own door though, Felix strides as confidently as he can over to his own, opens it with hope that that the shaking of his hands is less visible than it feels, and gestures for Sylvain to step inside.

Because if they're going to talk, there's no fucking way he's doing it in Sylvain's room where his head paints pictures of him and his million girls, where everything smells like him, where Felix would have leave one last time and never return. He'd rather kick him out of his own place.

Sylvain looks at him for a second, surprised, but wordlessly accepts this turn of events and walks inside. When Felix has closed the door and turns around, Sylvain has placed himself on his bed, so he just leans against the door, a safe distance away.

"Talk." He says. Sylvain looks miserably at him. When he speaks again, his voice is laced with guilt, like he’s asking Felix for something selfish and awful.

"Can you please come sit next to me?"

That sentence cuts Felix like a knife, and he _knows_ he should say no.

Once Felix has sat down, Sylvain repeats the sentence from earlier.

"I can't do this anymore."

He has never seen Sylvain like this. Ever. Not even close. He looks so _weak_ , as though he has given up on whatever is weighing on him before they've even had this conversation.

Felix remains silent. He doesn't trust his voice to not betray him.

"This is too painful for me Felix, please, can we stop this. I'm in pain." Sylvain whispers, voice cracking and a sad smile tugging on his lips.

" _Why_?" Felix asks, voice as drained as he feels. But he too is _tired_ of this. Tired of the tension between them, but also equally tired of Sylvain as before. Of his antics and words that don't make any sense and do nothing but tug painfully on his heart or make him want to die. There's no good way to resolve the situation, Felix knows that. So he doesn't know why he's asking or why he's even here.

A pained, self-deprecating laughter spills out of Sylvain, and it feels like knives in Felix's ears. It echoes in his head reminiscent of the screams that are the aftermath of his nightmares and he feels like he's about to throw up. Then, after way too long, Sylvain stops just like abruptly, in order to freeze up like a statue instead.

"Because I'm in love with you and this is killing me."

Felix's brain hits the breaks and shuts down completely. All he can do is stare at Sylvain, who's silently looking at the wall on the other side of his room. His shoulders are shaking and he's seemingly still silently laughing. And then, Felix spots a tear running down Sylvain's cheek.

It's like someone's punched him in the gut, taken all the air out of his lungs.

_you're making my life so difficult, fe_

_oh Felix, all i need to feel better is the sound of your voice_

_don't you worry about me, I'm happy if you're happy._

_oh, you know I love it when you do that move_

_listening to you is way more interesting_

_anything for you babe!_

Every stupid ridiculous comment Felix had assumed to be bad attempts at jokes suddenly gain deeper meaning as they echo in his head all at once. Had Sylvain been telling the truth, laying it out in the open all this time in his own ridiculous way? Felix's eyes slide shut, his fist clenched in the sheets and his heart beating like a drum.

He feels like should be telling Sylvain to fuck off, that it isn't funny, because it should be a joke. By everything he knows about the world, it should be. Only it isn't. By the expression on Sylvain's face, by the tone of his voice he knows it's true. Felix struggles to process it anyway.

"How long?" He asks, voice tight and he should probably say something else, like tell him that he loves him too but he's not ready to do that yet. What he's not ready for either though, is Sylvain redirecting his attention to Felix, the desperation in his eyes or the new, even hollower laughter that he barks out before replying. It's possibly the worst sound Felix has ever heard.

"How long? How _long_?! I don't know how long. I don't know when I _didn't_ think about kissing you every time I saw you? I pushed it down for a while, we didn't see each other for a while you know, when we were teens and then we came _here_ and the _moment_ I laid eyes on you again I knew that it was fucking _hopeless_ , Felix, you have no _idea_ what the last five years have been like for me, coming back here _again_ because of the slight chance of seeing you and you _were_ here, it was like I hadn't breathed for _five years_ Felix, I was so fucking happy but now you hate me, so I've been walking around the past few days wondering what's even the point of being alive because fuck it, right, if you don't even _like me_ , hey, maybe you'd be happier if I was dead, I don't know, I don't fucking know how long Felix, I don't know. I don't know."

Sylvain's rant starts in with a booming shout and ends in a whisper and with even more tears spilling out of his eyes. Felix blinks, and something inside of him reminds him that he's being an _ass_ right now for allowing Sylvain to believe that Felix doesn't reciprocate his feelings. So, he does the only reasonable thing he can think of since his brain still seems unable to figure out how speech works.

He grabs Sylvain's face with both hands, maybe a little too roughly but that's only because he's still shaking, and closes the distance between their faces.

Sylvain makes a startled noise into his mouth, and at first he doesn't kiss him back, instead freezing in place and for about 0.6 seconds Felix starts panicking, wondering if he had misunderstood after all but the moment he starts pulling away Sylvain comes back to life, makes a panicked noise that sounds vaguely like a no and chases his mouth, grabbing Felix's head to _finally_ kiss him back.

Sylvain kisses him like he hasn't kissed anyone in years, hungrily and desperate and completely without finesse, but Felix feels himself melt into it despite that. He allows Sylvain to take the lead and breathes in sharply when Sylvain whines, climbs closer, clumsily grabbing at him and pushing him down on the mattress, draping his body over Felix's. Sylvain is pleasant weight contrasting how feather light he feels, grounding him somewhat in reality as he wraps his arms around the warm body above him.

When they finally pull apart to breathe, he keeps his eyes closed, listening to Sylvain taking deep, ragged breaths above him.

"Fe?" Sylvain finally asks in a small voice, and the second he opens his eyes he regrets it because the sight is overwhelming and his stomach flips in a way that almost makes him feel nauseated. Sylvain’s eyes are still a little wet and he's looking at Felix like he's a Saint who has just appeared in front of him, disbelieving and reverent like Felix is the most surreal thing that has ever existed or happened.

So Felix has to look away. It's too much, too much at once. He glances at the ceiling above him, and then closes his eyes again.

"Hmm?" He replies to Sylvain’s plea while holding his breath, his jaw clenched tight. It comes out a lot less steady than he had hoped, but it's a communicative sound at least so he'll take it. Sylvain makes some kind of noise, sounding as though he can't make up his mind if he's terrified, shocked or ecstatic.

"Is this real?" Sylvain whispers, and Felix can't hold back the snort that comes out of him, at which Sylvain twitches slightly.

"Of course it's real, idiot." He replies easily, more brash than means to but that's because it's a _normal_ line from him, an automatic response, but it seems to calm Sylvain down regardless because Felix feels how Sylvains head comes down to rest on his chest. It feels safe, and one of his hands automatically comes up to bury itself in Sylvains hair, nails scratching against his scalp. Sylvain sighs in response, pushing his head even further into Felix's hand and _that's_ his heart does a backflip because this is apparently the moment he realizes what has just happened and he suddenly feels like he's falling off a steep cliff.

He _kissed_ Sylvain and he kissed him back.

Sylvain is _in love with him_

"Okay."

Sylvain’s response to Felix's comment is slightly delayed, and comes after he has taken a few deep breaths, but it's not like that matters. Apparently they're both slow as shit.

They stay there, Felix isn't sure how long, if it's hours or fifteen minutes. It feels like they've entered a bubble, where only the two of them in this bed exists.

"I'm confused." Sylvain says, finally, popping the bubble, and Felix opens his eyes again. Sylvain’s head is still on his chest but he's leaning up, looking at Felix's face from what is sure to be a very unflattering angle, something in Felix's head shouts at him. He ignores it best he can because that's a _stupid_ thing to worry about right now.

"You tell me to fuck off, basically, then you kiss me."

Felix groans, but he doesn't get a chance to reply before Sylvain asks another stupid question.

"Did you do this for me? For my sake?"

He looks so serious and insecure it throws Felix off completely, as he opens his mouth and closes it again, wordlessly. The fact that Sylvain would assume that Felix kissed him for _his sake_ , that Felix... What, gave him some sort of _pity kiss_ , rather than _anything_ else is actually kind of infuriating. Sylvain’s lips tug upwards in a sad smile, warmth remaining in his eyes despite how ready he looks to be let down.

Felix isn't going to allow that to happen for any longer, that expression makes his heart twist painfully, makes him want to cradle Sylvain in his arms and never let him go.

"No." Felix replies gruffly, which is a real word so that's good. Sylvain’s brow furrows, because he's an idiot who apparently can't imagine that Felix might _not_ actually be immune to the fact that Sylvain is the fucking sun, that Felix might be interested in his warmth too. Like every other person on the goddamn planet. But not for his crest, for _him_ and all his idiocy.

"Then why-"

"Think about it." Felix sighs, shutting Sylvain down mid question because he's not sure how to word anything and things would be so much easier if Sylvain just _got it_ like he does with every other feeling Felix has ever had ever. It's beyond him how Sylvain has always managed to read him like a book yet hasn't been able to see this giant, obvious thing that even other people apparently noticed. He groans inadvertently at the memory of the conversation with Mercedes, and Sylvain looks up at him, worried. Felix squeezes him with the arm still wrapped around him, hoping it will tell Sylvain what he can't say with words, but he just looks lost and confused again.

"Do you like me too?" Sylvain asks quietly after the long silence between them. It's a simple question with a simple answer, but all Felix manages is to do take a very sharp breath. Sylvain suddenly pushes himself off Felix's chest, and the next thing he knows Sylvain’s face is hovering above him, one hand on each side of Felix's head.

"Do you like me too?" Sylvain repeats, newly birthed fire in his eyes and a hint of desperation in his voice. Felix stares back at him, that is, until he can't and has to avert his eyes again because talking is difficult as it is, and with Sylvain looking at him like that it's completely impossible. He turns his head to the side, heartbeat loud in his ears and he's being _such an ass_ right now, fuck, but Sylvain is too much for him to handle when he's that close and Felix can smell him and feel his body pressed against him, not to mention that fucking look in his eyes again. And then, he feels his _traitorous_ , traitorous face get red hot as he swallows around something thick in his throat. He shuts his eyes again, the darkness somewhat grounding him. This isn't how he'd have liked this to go. But then again, maybe he should just be fucking happy it's happening at all.

"Mhm." he pitifully gets out, but it does the trick. Sylvain inhales in sharply.

"Felix!" He almost shouts, causing Felix's snap to snap open again and his focus is back on Sylvain’s face which is probably good because it gives him a split second warning before he's being peppered with kisses over his whole face.

"Hey, fuck off!" he says, but he realizes that he's smiling mid sentence. Sylvain obeys, but continues gleaming at him like Felix is the combination of all of his dreams coming true at once. Felix scoffs but he can't wipe the smile off his face no matter how hard he tries (in the back of his head something asks him _why_ he's even trying, what the point is now, but he ignores it.) and that somehow causes Sylvain crack an impossibly bigger smile to mirror him. Then he laughs.

This time it's nothing like the previous. The laughter bubbles out of him like he has nothing to worry about in the entire world, like he's just found the source of eternal happiness.

"I can't believe you." Felix mumbles, corners of his mouth still refusing to point anywhere but up, his voice shaking like it wants to join Sylvain’s laughter.

"This is the best day of my life." Sylvain replies with childlike glee before another laughing fit takes him. Felix sighs but this time he can't stop the laughter that starts in his chest and bubbles out of him too.

"You're ridiculous." Felix says, warmth pooling in his stomach all the same.

"I know!" Sylvain replies incredulously, shoulders still shaking. Then, he leans down and kisses Felix again. It's tentative at first, like he's expecting... What, that Felix is going to change his mind? He grunts, irritated at the thought, pulls Sylvain’s head that tiny bit closer and feels Sylvain smile against his lips as the uncertainty disappears. One of Sylvain’s hands comes up to grab at his hair too this time, and Felix _definitely_ doesn't miss the spark that goes down his spine when Sylvain tugs ever so slightly at it. Sylvain apparently registers that something happens as well, because his hand snakes up and tugs even harder, and a moan pushes itself out of Felix before he even registers it. Sylvain’s erratic breathing tells him that he _definitely_ heard it, and Felix feels his face heat up again, and before he has a chance to do anything else Sylvain’s other hand has slid up to his face, cradles it as his thumb angles his face up without warning, and an embarrassingly breathy noise spills out of Felix as heat pools dangerously fast in his stomach. His grip on Sylvain’s hair tightens and Sylvain moans encouragingly and it's honestly probably the sexiest thing Felix has ever heard, his blood shooting south.

Sylvain apparently has psychic sex powers, because at the exact same moment he nudges his knee between Felix's legs, and Felix's brain short-circuits as his lips stop kissing Sylvain in favour of moaning out said name instead.

"Sylv- _ain_ "

"God, look at you." Sylvain replies and when Felix opens his eyes to glare at him, Sylvain is staring back at him hungry and worshipping, his pupils blown and his face flushed and it's way too much, he feels like _prey_ , the way Sylvain is looking at him, so Felix closes them again.

"Shut _up_ " He groans, but Sylvain chooses exact that moment to grind his knee against Felix's crotch so it comes out much breathier than he means it to.

"Felix" Sylvain whines, letting go of his face in favour of caressing his neck, feather light touches coming down to his collarbones where a wide hand splays itself out, reaches under his shirt to touch as much skin as possible. A tingling, almost burning trail is left after Sylvain’s touch, and without a single thought preceding Felix aggressively reaches up and grabs Sylvain’s wrist and pulls his hand up ever so slightly, and pushes it against his own throat. Sylvain makes a noise reminiscent of both a gasp and a whimper as he immediately catches the drift and _fuck_ Felix didn't even know he was into that but when Sylvain’s hand presses experimentally of its own accord all thoughts about where that might have come from disappear as Felix's head lolls back. When Sylvain with a groan does it again in combination with another movement of the thigh between Felix's legs, a breathy moan tells him to continue as Felix's sees stars and his eyes almost roll back in his head.

" _Fuck_ "

"Oh my fucking _goddess_ Felix, you're going to fucking kill me." Sylvain whines, before he's pulled back down for another kiss.

It's messier this time, someone's saliva makes a wet trail on Felix's face and aggravatingly, Sylvain insists in babbling against his mouth instead of kissing him properly.

"So fucking hot Felix, so fucking _good_ for me, better than I ever dreamed of, so fucking good-" Sylvain rambles, and what's even more aggravating is that it makes Felix even more painfully hard, and he whines loudly against his will when what spills out of Sylvain’s mouth is "-wanted this for so long, _so long_ Felix, _fuck_ I've thought about this so many times, never came as hard as I did after you slept in my bed and my pillow smelled like you-" because Felix _remembers_ that night, how he was carried back half conscious and completely drunk and wondered in the back of his mind why Sylvain wasn't putting him in his own room, how he'd woken up rock hard and dazed by the scent of Sylvain surrounding him and said boy asleep on the floor under a single blanket. He remembers walking back to his own dorm and muffling his own voice with a pillow, shaking as he came back down both from the intensity of the orgasm and from the shame. The image in his head, of Sylvain climbing back into that bed still warm and slowly bringing himself to ecstasy, finishing with a whisper of Felix's name on his lips is what does it for him - well, that in combination with Sylvain’s continuous praise, a tight squeeze against his neck and the grind of Sylvain's knee against him.

Felix comes with a sharp breath, and Sylvain kisses him through it like a man starved, keeps his knee in place until Felix slowly starts shifting his body and groans uncomfortably. Sylvain collapses against him and moves his knee and the hand on Felix's throat in one movement, and his throat in particular feels empty without Sylvain’s hand around it.

Fuck , that's way too kinky for Felix's comfort.

_Fuck_ , he just came in his pants like a fucking kid. For some reason, that feels like the thing he needs to defend, like that's the part that's a threat to his honour and pride.

"I don't... I usually don't-" He starts, voice unsteady, but Sylvain interrupts him.

"It's okay Fe, you're not the only one."

Oh. That stops Felix in his tracks. He hadn't even noticed that--

What the hell.

"Okay" He replies stupidly, and Sylvain hums warmly against his chest. The vibrations travel over his entire body, reaches his scalp and leaves through the tips of his fingers.

"I love you too." He then adds, almost like it's an afterthought, and flushes bright red at his own straightforwardness. Sylvain, however, just looks up at him, starry eyes shining.

"Yeah?" he smiles, and Felix's breath gets stuck in his throat. It's a new expression on Sylvain. It's strange, because he knows them all, the old and the new, yet this one he has never seen before.

"Yeah." Felix confirms meekly. Fuck, he feels weak. Vulnerable. It's an alien feeling, and makes him want to squirm, almost makes him want to push Sylvain off him and curl inside himself.

Then, one of Sylvain’s hands finds one of his. Their fingers lace together, easily and naturally as anything, and when Felix gazes down at Sylvain again, he's watching their clasped hands with wonder and adoration. And suddenly, the feeling of wanting to get away from the situation transforms into one of wishing it would never end. He wants to keep looking, wants to burn this picture into his brain, but the exhaustion that hits him wins out. _There'll be plenty of moments like this to come_ a voice inside of him says.

"I'm going to sleep." Felix declares, and feels Sylvain nod against him.

"Alright."

When his eyes slide shut, he feels Sylvain’s lips ghost over their hands, a kiss pressed to his knuckles. The last thing he hears before sleep claims him is a whisper.

"Mine."

* * *

"Even back then?!"

"Yes you dolt - why are you _clinging_ to me like that?"

"Making up for lost time."

"... Fine, do what you must."

"I want to learn everything about you."

" What do you- You already _know_ everything about me!"

"Clearly there are things I have missed."

"... Right."

_"All this time-"_

"Stop moaning, you're so annoying."

"Yet, you're in love with me."

"... Unfortunately."

"You know I'm still so happy to hear you say that I'm not even insulted."

"Ugh, shut _up_ , don't look at me like that."

"If _you'd_ been paying attention you'd know I'm physically incapable of not looking at you like this, I've always looked at you exactly like this."

"You have _not_."

"Well not when you were paying attention."

"You're _lying_ , I'd have noticed."

"Ask Ingrid."

"Ask- _what_ , she _knew_?"

"Yes, because I've always looked at you like this."

"You're so _aggravating_ "

"You're adorable when you're this grumpy."

"Shut _up_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i never write porn so who knows what this is

**Author's Note:**

> felix succeeds after encouragement by sylvain is one of my favorite things actually


End file.
